Friday, May 4, 2012

Thoughts of a Black Republican - North Carolina Amendment One

Please note the opinions expressed in the following post are solely mine.  I usually don't talk politics, preferring to keep blog fare light.  However, the following thoughts have been going through my mind as the May 8th election approaches here in North Carolina.  Feel free to share your opinions in the comments - even disagree with me.  But, I ask that you do so in a respectful manner.  Thanks! ~ Mary Ellen 

On May 8th, North Carolina voters will take to the polls.  At the forefront is Senate Bill 514, known as Amendment One.  The bill proposes an amendment to the state constitution defining marriage between one man and one woman as the only domestic legal union recognized by the state.  Around our quiet little neighborhood, yard signs have sprouted up showing support for both sides of the issue.  When it comes down to where I stand on the matter, I find myself on the fence!

I was raised in a Christian home; Baptist to be exact.  Even though my parents were lifelong Democrats, they maintained traditional, conservative values.  The Bible is clear in regards to marriage - one man, one woman.  That is how I was raised to view marriage.  Even though I'm now apart of a different faith tradition (Catholic), my default when I think of marriage remains the same.

BUT...on the other hand....

Does it have any effect on me or my marriage if two people of the same sex wish to legalize their union?  I would have to say no.  And is it really necessary to amend the state constitution when state law already prohibits same sex couples from marrying?  Then, there is the matter of this video.  Jodie Brunstetter, wife of NC Senator Peter Brunstetter, allegedly states her husband crafted the bill in order to protect the "Caucasin race".  Mrs. Brunstetter is now maintaining her comments were misconstrued.  Well, my marriage doesn't look like this

So does that mean my marriage is not worth protecting because it doesn't further the Caucasin race?  For me, the comments Mrs. Brunstetter is alleged to have made brings to mind that not too long ago, laws existed to prevent the marriage of blacks and whites.  Some of the same arguments offered against same sex marriage today (harmful to the fabric of society, harmful to children born of those unions, unnatural, sinful) were also offered against marriages JUST LIKE MINE at one time in this country.  And I can tell you first hand, there is nothing unnatural about the love my husband and I share for one another!

Lots of points to consider before next Tuesday!

Mary Ellen  


  1. I am not married, but I have no problem with people of same sex getting married. I think any HUMAN couple (male/male female/female male/female) of age or with legal consent from their parents should be allowed to enter into marriage. I find the fact that most conservatives argue that they want less government in our lives but then want to tell people who they can and cannot marry ludicrous.

  2. I learned more about you from this post! (I just started following you not very long ago.)

    I, too, am Catholic, but I have a hard time with government stepping in on many things. I have recently been unnerved and upset with regard to the HHS Mandate and the government trying to force people of my Faith Tradition to do things which have been defined as intrinsically evil (support and/or provide and/or fund contraception and abortifacients).

    While I believe it's an overreach of government to do that...I also believe it's an overreach of government to step in here, too. My main concern, as a Catholic, on this issue is the precedent set in Canada where priests have been jailed or fined for "hate speech" for simply stating what the teachings of the Catholic faith are with regard to marriage. That is something I am concerned about going forward should homosexual marriage be licensed by the state. While I don't have a problem if two members of the same sex doesn't affect me personally...I will have a problem if they try to force the Catholic church to validate that marriage, as that is impossible based on the beliefs. (I know there are Catholics who are homosexual, etc...but the Catechism is fairly clear that having same-sex attraction and/or homosexual tendencies is not a sin and teaches that we must treat all with dignity and respect unique to their person. However ACTING on those tendencies in a sinful way (i.e., sexual acts not open to life) is the sinful part...much like with a Catholic couple who gets sterilized or contracepts--using the contraception or sterilizing is the sin, there, and as we all know...sin is sin and no sin is less than or better than any other)

    I hope that makes sense, and I hope I haven't upset anyone with sharing my stance on this.

    thank you for writing this as I really appreciate your perspective!

  3. Hello

    This topic/election doesn't concern me that much since I am not living in the States, I am from Finland.

    But.. my best friend is a lesbian. I have known that (well, expected she is..) since we were teenagers. She came out of the closet when she was 28 when she came to peace with herself. She is now in a registered relationship, married if you will, and have been for 3 years. Her wife is now pregnant with their first child and I will be Godmother. I could not be happier for them or for the child: those two are happy together, have goals in life, open-minded and loving couple.

    When my friend called me to tell that she is gay, I was a bit confused perhaps. Not because I didn't see it coming, but because it was said outloud. I had to see her the very next day just to see how i would react, would I bee the supporting friend I always thougt I was? And yes, I was :) When she found her future wife, she changed and for the better! She shows more effection to friend, she huggs and tells "i love you" and is more gentle.. She has more confidence.

    Before.. she was a bit aggressive and got in to an argument so easily that it wasn't always that much fun to go out with her. One of our friends said (hadn't seen her in few years) that "when she came to hug me I feared she wants to hit me!!" Though, she has never been violent, I have to say.

    So what I've been trying to tell is that she was born that way.. she was confused for almost 28 years of her life and now, she's not anymore. She has lived in the way she was born and she has found peace in herself and I love her. I only wish she had had more confidence in me and told me earlier about the things she had struggled alone for so long so she wouldn't have been so alone. But better late than never.

    oops, i made a novel here.. :)

    I hope noone gets offended with this text, that is not intention! Just wanted to bring another point of view.

  4. Life is to short to dictate to someone who they can or can not be with. I do not have problem with same sex couples and marriages; once you find your true soul mate you should be free to act on those feelings. Bitterness towards openly gay couples and mixed race couples is out there and will probably remain with us forever but if you love someone you will learn to live with it and continue on with your life, happily.

    Those who remain bitter and judgemental are only hurting themselves, they are taking away precious time from their loved ones to focus on someone that probably don't even know and could care less about their opinion.

    Does this post make any sense? I get heated with topics like this.

    Blessings to you & your beautiful family.


  5. Hi Mary Ann,

    I have to say that my thoughts on this issue are very similar to yours. I know and believe what the Bible teaches, thus I believe it is the responsibility of the CHURCH, not the GOVERNMENT, to deal with this issue.

    You're quite correct; up until 1967 in the landmark Supreme Court decision in Loving v. The State of Virginia, the government believed it had the right to say who could marry whom. Isn't this the same thing?

    I believe a church or domination has the right to decide if it will or will not perform same-sex unions, but I don't believe the government has the right to decide the legality of same-sex unions.

    Thanks for this thoughtful, well-crafted post that was obviously written in a spirit of peace.

  6. I've heard those misgeneation laws were written to keep the white race, white. Blacks could marry another group even asian or latin etc.
    About same sex marriage, i could see it becoming a problem and/or lead to polygamy, or something like it; maybe not now, but at a later date. Most women want to be married, and theres no penetration involved, which makes it DANGEROUS for men--thats just common sense, if not biblcal sense...
    I know the 'same sex' folks uses the black/white marriages for their struggles-and are making inroads.I would HATE for polygamy to be the 'law of the land' since marriage "one man, one woman" isnt protected..a man in the future could say he 'loves' 3 different women and they love him....sigh

  7. I disagree with that silly broad, Ms. Brunstetter--shes just 'over the top' and scared her kids will give her a half black granchild---sheesh